ISO: Full time Maid

willing to work for free..
It's tough trying to do a deep clean while caring for an almost 6 month old baby who wants to do nothing but ROCK IT OUT all day.
Don't get me wrong - I wouldn't trade it for the world, BUT, he just doesn't understand what it means when Mommy says " Hold on just a second Buds mommy has cleaning chemicals that could give you cute little self cancer all over her hands " Ya know what I mean?

Trying to get this house spick & span, but it aint happening as fast I would like.
Ho hum, Ho hum.

On another note, Teo's first tooth is plunging through his gums and it's turned him into a little Baby Asshole. Fuss Fuss Fuss, sleep, eat, Fuss Fuss Fuss, play, sleep, eat, Fuss Fuss Fuss - oh and get up multiple times during the night after starting to sleep through the night just a few weeks back - WTF!

And I'm thinking about getting pregnant again after he turns one..
Am I crazy? Nah!

You making poo poos?

** he chuckles**
He always gets the most excited when he's about to take a huge dump ( sorry for the the graphics ).
And I laugh, because the face he makes when he's ready to explode is pretty much the same face he's been making since he was a newborn - He turns bright red, stick his tongue out, and grunts - These are the things I'll remind him of on his wedding day, or at least at the rehearsal dinner.

I wish pooping my pants made me as happy as it makes him - I on the other hand need things like new washing machines, the latest Febreeze air freshening device or a hot shower to fit my fancy. I think those to be the smaller things in life, but a big ol' poopy diaper has me beat I think.

 

When you were 5 months old:

an eyelash fell from your beautiful little eye.
In a flash I wiped it from your soft skin and blew it away from my finger tip and I made a little wish for you.

I wished that you'd healthy, wealthy, and strong.
I wished you'd never have any obstacles and that if you did they'd mold you into a good man.
I wished never ending amounts of love upon you and happiness with no limits.
I wished you success and laughter, a long list of memories made with friends you'd never forget.

My sweet son - You complete me.
I am forever in your debt for the happiness you've given me.

Love thy neighbor!

So I hit the trail this morning, baby is all tucked into his stroller as per usual - Decided to switch it up today & bring 1 of our 3 dogs.. Was in such a rush to get myself, stroller/ baby and pup out of the door that I forgot to bring a bag just in case pup decided to ya know, drop one or two off... We head on down the road, my neighborhood was quiet this morning - Not the normal hustle bustle of kids getting on bus, people watering plants, etc - I was so excited for the peace. Don't you know that as soon as we get in front of the ONLY house where someone is outside having a cup of a coffee my dog's ass expels a lovely pile of glory & like mentioned above I have no bag to clean it up. Leave it to the ONLY ( asshole ) person to cross my path this morning to say to me " Are you going to clean that up? " Not only does she not offer me a bag to do so she watches me walk all the way back to my caul-de-sac (sp?), I grab a bag walk all the way back only to find the bitch has gone inside - I should have lit that bag of poop on fire & left it on her doorstep - HAPPY HUMP DAY!

The Domestic Diva Chronicles - INTRO

'Tis the life of a Domestic Diva. Awake in the wee hours to start a pot of coffee for your mate, change the little ones diaper & make sure he's well fed. Start the dishwasher for the first of what will be at least 2 cycles for the day. Potty & feed the dogs, make sure they have water since you always seem to forget when you're in the height of your day. Plan meals for Breakfast, lunch & dinner - Laundry, but of course there is laundry. Create a list of things to do, take a nice long walk. Squeeze a shower in where you may, PJ's are my uniform.

3 month later, and I feel....

a Routine in the making.
Our family is getting into the swing of .
Our parenting gets better & better.
and of course, Our baby is absolutely perfect in our eyes.

Teo will be 12 weeks old on Friday. We're celebrating his first Easter this weekend and I feel like if I didn't take pictures of this little person every day it would all be gone in a blink of an eye & I may have missed something. I want to document his every day, his every move, his every smile so I can look back on it and remember my precious little baby, even when I am sending him off to college.

Motherhood is an experience that is unmatched by any other.
I'd like to think that I've been good at a few things in my lifetime, maybe not exceptionally good but good nonetheless... Motherhood is something that not only I am good at but I have come into so easily. I can't even begin to tell you what this feels like, my best advice would be to allow yourself to experience it in your lifetime - Even if it's just once, carrying, birthing and raising a child is a one in a million experience.

Teo went off to daycare like a good little boy...
Made it a week before he got sick, stayed home for a week.
Went back for a week, and then we yanked him out.
I'm so tired of bitching and moaning about it that I'm not going to go into detail but I will say this: Daycare is not for the weak of heart. You have to be one hundred percent ready to hand your children over to strangers daily... You have to be ready to have little to no control over what your child is exposed to.. Including: Thrush, RSV, Runny nose, a variety of strange women... You have to allow yourself to drop them off every morning & not cry your eyes out because you're going to miss them every day.
I couldn't handle it..
I am now a stay at home mom 95% of the week.
I still work Monday's so I can get out of the house & have some adult time.
Being a stay at home Mommy is amazing.

I wont miss ANYTHING!
I wont miss one moment of this little guy growing up..
And for that I am truly happy..
And thankful!
Thankful that my husband works so hard to allow me to be at home raising our little wonder.

the Most special boy in ALL the land!

The baby is 1 month old, and unharmed - Hallelujah.

Our little bean is 1 month old and has yet to suffer from any bodily harm.
I'm pleased to report that Brett Miller & I are actually amazing parents.
When people tell you all that crap about how when your child is born you parenting instinct will kick in.
It's not crap.
It's fact.
As soon as his little life on the outside started I was reborn, I become a mother.
The feeling is inexplicable & undoubtedly the most amazing thing I've ever done.
There's no room for selfishness.
There's no time to second guess yourself.
You just act.. selflessly for your child.
I'm smitten.

The first month of being parents has been filled with laughs, tears, lessons learned, and sleepless nights. I have to admit that I have been pee'd and poop'ed on almost daily. Sadly, I found a brown stain on my shirt at the end of a long Mommy day yesterday... It obviously had been there for a while ( awesome, so I was too busy being a mommy to even see it ) trying to figure out what it is from looking at it is impossible ( but like I mentioned it was brown ) and you absolutely refuse to taste it so that leaves you nothing else but to smell it. I don't have to finish the story, I'm sure you all can figure out what the verdict was.

• I've witnessed our child projectile poop off the side of the bed.
• I've come across a diaper so full of poo that he was covered from front to back & we had NO choice but to hold him over the sink so we could hose him down.
• I've been soaked in pee, Brett's been soaked in pee, Eli came to visit & got soaked in pee.
• I used to be squeamish about baby throw up, now that I wear baby  throw up as an accessory I am numb to it.. bring on the baby puke!

Brett and I had the opportunity to have our first night out this weekend.

Needless to say I got white girl wasted & ended up dancing on the stage of the bar we went to. You'd think that after becoming a mother there would be things that I would grow out of but stage dancing apparently is not one of them - Go figure. I missed our Little Prince SO much while we were out but I fought the urge to bother my mother in law with "check in" texts every 15 minutes & really let myself go for the night. Moral of the story, minor hang over as a mommy = NO BUENO!

My maternity leave is drawing to an end - I go back to work on the 27th & the little man will start @ the Gateway Academy. As we get closer I start to already get more & more jealous of the women that will get to spend the entire day with my little boy... I also have been trying to think of what I'll decorate his crib @ the Daycare with, but that's neither here nor there. 

I find my favorite past time these days is staring at my kid sleeping ( stalker status I know ). I have never enjoyed a hot shower so much in my entire life. I was able to operate on 3 hours of sleep during my go go party barbie days but I have to say I dominate on 3 hours of sleep as New Mommy :)

On that note ... He's sleeping ... Time to stare at him! Until next nap time Blog Buddies!