Saturday, August 10, 2013

Banana Yo Mama

Thursday night was a disaster.

Emma was reeling from her shots on Wednesday, and to top it off has started the early stages of teething. Even more icing on the cake - She's in the middle of a growth spurt & wants to nurse like crazy. Needless to say she slept like shit.

Teo was unsettled, woke many times through out the night, as if he was having bad dreams. I'm going to pin point it on being over tired, but I just can't tell with him. He's just not a good sleeper, it's like things easily bother him through the night. Perhaps his stomach, or dreams, or noises, or whatever it may be - He just can't seem to sleep through the night often. He's going to be 2 in January, there has to be some end in sight for these nightly interruptions, am I right?

I spent much of yesterday dragging ass around this place - I didn't feel to vacuum, fold laundry, or any of the other things I do daily to keep on top of my domestic empire. I just wanted to cry, or scream, or all of the before mentioned all at the same time. 

Because they both were so tired from their restless night, they both just bitched & whined & needed & wanted .. At more than one moment I wanted to just lock myself out on the back porch, I wanted to hide in the bathroom, I just wanted to cry or scream.

Thunder storms rolled in yesterday afternoon, and at the perfect time - Nap time! While most would think this may disturb the ever so needed nap time, it didn't. I'm convinced it soothed them, they slept for hours. And I did too, and it felt good. I needed that. 

Then last night rolls in, Daddy comes home from work. Teo's always the happiest when Daddy comes home from work, although I find he just stands at his feet whining for his attention - Which makes it super hard for Daddy to unwind after just getting home. But still, he's just so happy to see his Daddy. They played upstairs for hours, came down stairs & we played some more. While they were tucked away upstairs having them time, Emma and I sat out back on the deck. I did some much needed maintenance to my toe nails, and she just cooed. By then she had decided that she was going to be pleasant. I think she was just too tired to cry, or bitch, or moan. Ahhh ... Relief. 


Somewhere in between all of this stuff, I peeked my head outside & realized for the first time that the Little Green Man that urges my neighbors to SLOW THE FUCK DOWN was gone. He normally lives right beside my mailbox, so happily standing there making it known that I really want people to drive safer in an area full of kids! Frustrated, angry, disappointed, I took to the neighborhood Facebook page & asked that if anyone should see my Little Green Man, to please let me know and/or return him to his loving home. There's teenagers on the rampage in our quite nice & quite expensive neighborhood - They apparently think it's funny to steal a random assortment of yard ornaments, Little Green Men, etc & then they toss them in the parking lot at the pool. Thankfully, a caring citizen of Northcliff saw my Little Green Man, notified me of his location & Brett did a drive by late last night to grab him. There he was ... Standing in the parking lot between the pool & the playground, just standing there waiting for his family to find him. Poor guy. He's tucked safely in Brett's trunk until I can either chain him to my mailbox, decorate him with a sign that says " Don't fuck with my Little Green Man " or something of the like. 

Emma went down with out a hitch, Teo was up a bit later than the norm but he too went down with out a fight & then the most amazing thing happened - They both slept through the night! 

There's never a dull moment. 

I woke this morning refreshed, happy, and back to waltzing through my day as a Mommy of 2, under the age of 2, with a smile on my face. 

This was just another reminder that not everyday is perfect. Not every day is smooth. Not every day is easy. But I do it, and I love it, and I wouldn't trade it for the world.

I especially wouldn't trade Teo walking around this morning saying " Banana Yo Mama ".
(( And so happy Little Green Man is back where he belongs!! )) 

Thursday, August 8, 2013

What does success smell like?

Success smells like popcorn popping, gasoline pumping into your tank, fresh cookies baked, your partner's musk. Success smells like Awesome.

I have to relish in the sweet smell of success .. Though, I still have work to do.

After I had Teo my step dad gave me money to go shopping for clothes. I was still so sloppy ( I'm talking about myself so it's safe to say that ) but needed a confidence boost, and he knew that. Instead of buying something I could wear at that moment I bought myself a few things that I set up in my closet as • Goal Clothes • I looked at these things, bound & determined to fit in them. As we all know, I became pregnant again & never had a chance to fit into this clothes - but I was in the process of trying when little Emma was conceived. I would try the items on & then crushed would hang them back on the hanger w/no hope in sight to wear them. 

That is until today!
2 babies later & some hard work/dedication - BAM - Mama can fit into her goal dress :) And I feel sexy, and I feel free, and I feel proud. I tried this on briefly after having Emma, it was like being in a sardine can! I again was crushed, felt defeated - but still used it as a goal. 

Now here I am! 
In the dress.
So happy.
But hungry to fit into the other things I have stashed away from my previous skinny life.

I think I can.
I think I can.
I know I can.
Lets go!